DOSSIER : WKRP - SUBJECT #1 - The Big Guy

The Many Faces of Gordon Jump, Renaissance Man.

This is the first installment of a new series I am adding to the WKRP-LOG.

it is a breakdown of each character, in depth. It is meant as an aid to the newly initiated “krp fan as well as a general checklist for the seasoned Buff. I call it DOSSIER : WKRP and each week I will address one character, studying their role and the artist(s) behind the Hollywood magic that brings to us again and again thanks to Internet technology, the diamond versatility of serial comic/drama which is WKRP in Cincinnati

SUBJECT #1 - THE BIG GUY -

“Wish not so much to live long as to live well” Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)

Whilst the main meat and potatoes of the action and certainly the high point of all the comic moments in the TV show WKRP always center on the characters Earl Tarlick and Loni Anderson, “The Big Guy” played by Gordon Jump, is a significant character, an anchor for the core action to take place around and quite often the pivotal dramatic foil at the crux of the writing in this program. In the show he owns the radio station WKRP. He is the sort of character who creates his own negative reality spreading his shitty attitude around so much that everything about him is cursed. His business is going bankrupt. He is always angry and frustrated. he alienates everyone he meets and frightens his employees. It is a subterfuge, he just wants people to leave him alone, so he uses the failing numbers his station pulls in to disabuse his staff and they are afraid to disturb his gloomy sanctum. Really, deep down he is a sad guy. he sits alone in his office and looks at an oil painting portrait of his dead mother. Sometimes the painting even speaks to him (voiced by Alice Ghostly) Hes so miserable, and every attempt of those around him to reach out is thwarted by his bitterness and temper. He throws shit at them and tells them to “Get the fuck outta my fuckin office you bitch!” and he spat at Earl once. Basically he is insane, but he is so rich, and such an asshole, no-one would ever suggest he was unwell, or in any way disadvantaged. He paces around in his office with the heat turned up (its summer) and he’s cursing, in a rage. All he really wants is to go fishing. He’s supposed to love fishing, and he does dream about fishing, often we see the same set piece, Big Guy is in a dinghy boat, in water with a (fake) mountain valley backdrop. Its his daydream fantasy and they always show the same shot when they depict him taking a breather from being his browned off usual mean old self. The insistence of the writers on including this not-exactly-funny comic trope and repeating it several times an episode even though it had tested as “stupid” in focus groups pre-airing and even for the fact that the live studio audience refused to laugh despite the “laugh” signs they use to prompt them. this is the story behind the introduction of “canned” laughter into the series in season one, even though I personally feel WKRP should appear unadulterated and therefore have transcribed several shows by hand and simply read along with the broadcast with the sound lowered.

that anecdote aside, it is within this recurring fantasy of Big Guy fishing that the payoff comes. you see, Big Guy doesn’t really want to fish, it is simply the location that he must see himself in so that the Big Guy in the fantasy, the fisherman in the fake boat Guy, he can dream his own dream, the daydream within the daydream. see, Big Guy goes fishing and then dreams of fame! He wishes he was a Huge Celebrity, a Star. In his little boat, in his imagination we see him accepting awards, promenading upon red carpets, he is blinded by flashbulbs always smiling, with his hand on his heart he serves the President and heads of state with his glorious art. he glows with specialness. these reveries, which are actually funny, are always broken by the same thing, Loni Anderson barging into his office with some sort of low-comic gag-dilemma, like she’s got chocolate fudge on her ass, or Earl tried to give her a makeover, or some other slapstick goof-off. Anyways Big Guy throws her out and calls her a whore, and thats that. Back to dreaming.

The actor Gordon Jump, who had another starring role as Radar O’Rieley’s  “roommate”  on the sadly-missed and lamentably short-lived “After M*A*S*H*” went on to a forge a lucrative career for himself as a motivational speaker in the 90s with his message of Personal Triumph through NLP and CERAGEM. In 2001 he was killed tragically in the events of 9-11. Yet another American hero fallen in the name of freedom and Democracy, he will live on in WKRP (and After M*A*S*H*) and always be remembered fondly. Let’s Roll Brotha.

 

DOSSIER : WKRP - SUBJECT #2 - Earl Tardjlic

The Face That Launched A Thousand Ships

I really am sorry about the title, it being this dudes name-but that’s what he’s called…it’s a funny name. He is South-African, Afrikaans, Dutch actually. That’s why he has a funny name and is always saying idiomatic Afrikaner shit like “Rumpo-stumpo, bal-lag,ya! pouffe! & Challakki dum pouffe! Marawayr fej n shit like that. You know him. You love him. You ask for him by name…The WKRP show would not be the same without him, yes! It’s Mr. Earl Tardjlik his own self, un-arguably the funniest and most lastingly endearing characters created in the Cincinnati Universe Involving radio station WKRP 105.3 AM.

Earl stole every episode he appeared in, most of the time the whole idea of the show focused on his perspective of the other soap-operatic proceedings at radio-station WKRP. Earl was this central POV, and it is wholly embodied in the comic sty lings of consummate method-player FrankBonner. Such suavetiere and flawless timing take it’s toll on even the few Olympic players who dare to pretend the throne and, sadly, as in Actor FrankBonner’s case, sudden death was surely the result!



No better way to die would ever surmise one’s bland expectations, especially in after-school time-slot syndications and rerun episodes. Earl was, and remains today the only truly redeeming feature of, comparatively, and conversely, the only endearment in an otherwise culturally un informed, intellectually bereft, and insignificant historical artifact vis-a-vis video tape. Years ahead of his time, he originated the single most important concept in contemporary culture: Corporate Rock. No other guy came near to what he did, he literally forged the template for what modern generations of A&R guy’s would begin to set their bar to the likes of your “Nirvana’s” and Rascle Flatts! I still remember it today, the first time I laid eyes on him, I knew it, I said to myself…this is the guy for me, I have stepped into my metier and need seek no further. Truly, a charmed life, as lived by one typifying grace under pressure.

How could anyone who has even heard mention of those eponymous call-letters “WKRP” or even seen an add in TVGuide or The Penny Pincher not entirely endorse every aspect associated with the character Earl Tardjlik of WKRP played by FrankBonner on NBC TV station in 1980s N America. If you Roger That Delta Niner than God Bless America! Bombs bursting forth lights, &c. Falcon 1-2-3

And if you rascals are on interfering Taliban frequencies, and listening in on good hearted god fearing American citizens, or any other variation of profiled personages and you think you can hold a mickey-mouse birthday candle to honest freedom loving citizen’s God-given rights and freedoms, especially manifest destiny, well than, you just read on Habib… Were into some heavy technology now! Can-Do-itive-nous & extreme adherence to good old American Know-How

Code seven blue!

Operation Yankee Rose in full effect..

All Systems GO!

Before the “other voice” kicks off…I am not at liberty to fully disclose on Character: Earl TaRDjlik. Even at this juncture, but please try back later or leave a comments in the posts. Thank you for reading this message.

Goodnight Mr & Mrs Internet & all the ships at sea

Over & Out

LONI ANDERSON SUPER-POST – An Introduction

Your Intrepid Reporter will stop at nothing to bring you the Full Loni Lowdown

  

   As many of you may have noticed, I appear to have been hesitant to tackle one of the main stars in the WKRP stable for my semi-regular DOSSIER  : WKRP section, and there is good reason for that. I am simply intimidated by the magnitude of the talent and accomplishments and struck almost speechless by the salacious real-life drama, and unbelievable twists and turns of fate, that surround probably one of the top 15 female comic actresses of all time. I’m not afraid to admit, that every time I approach the task of encapsulating this Mega-Super-Star’s career  trajectory and thrilling life story, I have to feel just a little humbled, and even I, knowledgeably; the World's leading Scholar in WKRP Historiography, Question Myself as to whether I am fit for this Herculean Task. For an actress who shot to dizzying hights of international fame and stardom, despite her seemingly hopeless, hard-scrabble beginnings, for her to be born with a repulsively deformed face, to penniless, illiterate, immigrant parents, themselves exiled in shame for unspeakable acts commited in "the old country". It is truly Epic in its scope to even consider the story of this meteoric clash with destny that is Loni Anderson. This inimitable, iconoclastic siren of both stage and screen, she not only overcame these disabilities but artfully turned them around on the audience and fully utilized them to further her innate genius for spreading mirth and enjoyment to young and old alike. A man has to remove his hat and show some respect, boys! Of course I am talking about Loni Anderson, whose path through the treacherous waters of fame I will endeavor to chart here; I've covered it all... the loves, the heartbreak, the family dramas and estrangements, the marriage to her cousin Burt Reynolds at the age of 14, the abandoned children, the destroyed lives, and suicides she left in her wake, even the scandal that proved too explosive for even the star herself, leading to her sudden withdrawl from the spot light, and even society itself, her final act, her swan song, taking the role of real-life shadowy recluse, which she remains to this day.

  For a life of such scope and magnitude, I inevitably thought it best to break her story into three parts, beginning next week with DOSSIER : WKRP  – LONI ANDERSON, Part 1. (The Early Years)

  So stay tuned right here to www.WKRP-log.blogspot.com, as I have done voluminous research and will expose shocking, never before heard, revelations,recounting, in blow-by-blow detail,  the dysfunctional family sagas,the cataclysmic romances and trails of shattered hearts and lives, the heroic battle against disability, and the gut-wrenching jests of fate that have all gone together in one of the most salacious tales of Hollywood excesses,  that have made this absolutely unique phenom the iconic superstar that she is today.

Part # Two. NUDES of Loni (get in here bros)

"Sources close to the star say... that Loni Anderson has been known to bathe in the nude and has also been witnessed as having taken public showers sometimes in gymnasiums & the like.

 

She also dabbled in psuedo-erotic no-core movies in the late 80's; after her TV career had gone "tits-up"
(more on that later...)

Still, even worse, before she got so 'large', she did commercials...



I know, I know...it doesn't look anything like her, but trust me, & trust my sources. That IS pre-reconstructive surgery Loni...Full-on and in-the-flesh. A rarity indeed. Her first appearance, and on half-inch video tape, no less. (also you can see where bailey quarters ripped her entire act off from!)
So stay tuned here, my babies, to WKRP-LOG, DOT - Blogspot, dot calm, for more salacious, down n dirty Loni Anderson XXX tape reviews deemed Too Hot For teh internets but brought to you here anyways, courtesy of me, your friend, informant, and dogged reporter...
Until next report...Over & Out!

"Wait for it! The payoff comes at 2:11"